I took tai chi for the first time tonight. Drove down icy streets in the dark. Landed in a room with blue carpet, looked like a church foyer. A class with two other students. I couldn’t hide.

Tai chi is harder than I imagined. Yoga can be physically challenging, but the brain gets it pretty quickly, even if the body doesn’t right away. Tai chi involves the coordination of so many forces, each with their own script. Right hand moving differently than left at the same time the feet are each doing their thing. Breathe in here, breathe out there. Flow and precision. Movement and balance. We learned 2 postures of a 46-posture form. It took concentration.

I watched the teacher, how his face changed from genial disorder to inscrutable composure as he moved through a set.

Perhaps this is what I need, the integration of my scattered forces into one. Coalescence.